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I'm not in the greatest space right now...

There's alot going on in my head, and I'm not overly comfortable talking about it.

Part of me wants to, but part of me just wants to retreat inward. it sucks. I'm not saying anyone out there is a bad friend, I just can't figure out what I'm comfortable telling to who...

this sucks...

yay drunk

after the week I've had, tonite was a much needed escape.

more later, drunky now...I will feel this in the morning

dammit...

Ok, so I'm looking for someone who is willing to let me borrow their digital camera for a couple lil projects I have. doesn't have to be an SLR either.

I did my very first airbrushed portrait this weekend. It's for marielouise00's daughter Clara. It's of John Lennon. Anyway, I want to get it up online and such for critique at a couple airbrush communities and on my site. and get the shirt to marielouise00.

I did have a camera with me this weekend, even got an image cd, which is missing. gone. I have tore apart my apartment, my car, it's gone. Which sucks cuz not only did it have photos of the finished work, but the process going into it. and a random shirt design I was asked to do that kinda' pushed my creativity (in a good way).


ear still blech...went to the walker today, will have an update on that later.

4dramatic_flair, get a hold of me about tomorrow

oh good...

*checks calender*

yep...it's November...cue the ear infection...



woot...


fuck my ear hurts...

I'm only sleeping...

augh...I wish.

Sorry for no updates recently...I have NOT been sleeping well. For some reason, I have this fun tendancy that I will get a rush of nightmares/night terrors spanding about a week.

yep...so, i won't sleep well and it takes me forever to convince myself to actually go to bed.

that's been this week...I'm also paranoid as fuck, crankier then hell..and depressed. I damn near cried at work yesterday from exhaustion.

one of the more recent dreams about some kind of parasite (yeah..icky buggy type things are a reoccuring theme lately)..caused me to actually leav a nice lil mark because in the dream I was scratching at my face...when I woke up, I was feeling around my face..checked the mirror and had a nice red spot where I was scratching in my sleep.

fun stuff huh? so add some insecurity and that's how I've been feeling most of the week.

I intend to hit Girls' night tonight after work (was asked by boss if I was available...I desperatly need the money)...I don't think I'll be spending the nite as different sleep environments could make things worse. woot...

on the plus side, I'm working on a portrait shirt. it'll be my first...hoping it turns out..

what are you doing for Halloween?

Well, it looks like I may head out to Ground Zero tonite...

apparently there's a zombie theme. I gotta' bring my zombie self out once more (at least).

I should be there around midnight...I gotta' work until 11. later!
hey, manna_panna..did you wanna' go to Scottish Dance tonight?

hey, marielouise00...do you have the day off tomorrow and if so do you wanna' help me go shopping for my work dinner thing tomorrow nite?

woot!

amazing night!

Thanks to people who get me off my sad ass and make me feel better.

more substantial post later. sleep now.

something in the air?

Was it just me or was it a rather sucky day for most people?

I'll have a post with some good news soon...

however, it seems like it was a rather down day...I'm having money troubles...nowhere wants to work around a freelancer it seems and I won't give up my job at the booth...I'm enjoying my work.

and much as I try to carry on and put on my big girl face in this month...

I miss my dad...

Need help!

So, 4dramatic_flair brought up a good point that I've been thinking on.

I need a stage name! any help is vastly appreciated, I will post a poll later if people come up with some names for me. my brain=no function today...weekend busy...me=sore.

Also, on the burlesque topic. 4dramatic_flair I have the first batch of film from last week, I'm working with the photos in photoshop (I asked them not to color correct at the lab, but they did....plus I'm picky and have some ideas for the photos); I am doing what I can to have cds out to the girls by Wed or a book.

anywho, I'm off for now.